I am me, Vladimir Concescu, Chief Product Engineer of the DuroSport Electronics Company.

I am back from my staying in Moldovan Prison #34,982. Did you missing me? Am very saddened that I wasn’t allowing to blogging from inside Moldovan Prison #34,982 and not sharing my thinkings on the bittorrenting of Heroes finale. Couldn’t Chiseljaw Flyingman just drop Spongeboy Squarehair over the ocean and flying away before explosioning instead of explosioning over New York? The Atlantic Ocean is very big. Big!

But I am not in the posting for that reason; I am recording the straight record on what Nero is writing about my prisonerness. I am explaining how it is all Nero’s fault. Nero’s!

The first: “Parking Tickets” were officialdom explainings, not real true story-telling. Nero is so authoritative following he accepted that explaining.

The true story-telling is that I was being taking back to Moldova for the gambling losings. In the Second Life. The Second Life! Had it not been for Nero’s insistings I would not have been going to the Second Life!! Thank you, Nero! (That is sarcastish.)

Had it not been for Nero’s insistings that I am coming to the Second Life for launches of the Virtual Prism DuroSport (which is outselling the iPod in the Second Life!), my avatard would not be flying into the Moldovan state-runned Cantemir Casino.

I am loving on the Blackjack. Many ex-girlfriends are saying I am addiction on the Blackjack. So was stopping the playing in the real life. But this was the Second Life. Not real. Playtime for Vladimir. Playtime!

In the first, my lucky was good good lucky. But, in late April, there was huge loss streaking happening. Huge! Dealers blackjacking times after times after times. Doubling on 11 vs. dealers 6 and losing. Bad bad lucky. Not even split of tens was helping my bad bad lucky. Suddenly I am owing Moldovan state-runned Cantemir Casino 404,721.75 Linden Dollars. Worst off: noone is telling me that is real money!! Equalling 20,000 Moldovan Leu of real money.

So Nero is flying over very big Atlantic Ocean for his thinking paying of “prisoner detention” but in reals, he is paying my gambling debts. Ha!

In the meanwhile, I was in Moldovan Prison #34,982 and am researching very very heavily on the MySpace, coming up with producting ideas for the Pütz by meeting many future ex-girlfriends. Some might be questioning my methodings, as always, but look at the awesomosity of the Prism 6000.

Not even Nero is questioning the Prism awesomosity.

65,000 Leu in Data Access charges is small pricing for his payment when Pütz is coming out. And VideoTron: not forgetful of the VideoTron. Both will be doubling in awesomosity!

Because now, Vladimir Concescu is back at the game! That is from my new bittorrented favorite show: John Of Cincinnatti.

One thing I am learning in Moldovan Prison #34,982 and John Of Cincinnatti: time and deadlines have no relevantness. The things are happening when they are happening because they are happening.

As will the Pütz.

Greetings, I am me, Madmann Legend.

Wow… sorry, I’ve been working around these Moldovans too much. You’d be surprised how easy it is to soak that up. They made me change “Loading, Please Wait” to the more Moldovan-correct “Making Load, Please To Waiting…” Just thinking about it, I’m making load right now.

I’ve been asked to write a few words about helping to bring the DuroSport 6001 into Second Life. I suggested “moist”, “juggernaut” & “dyspeptic”, but they wanted a whole bunch strung together into sentences, so here I go.

When I was first approached by my friends Blu & Sandry (aka LogSpark) to assist in this project, I was told we would be making a virtual version of the Prism DuroSport. I thought, “A glass jockstrap, what a marvelous idea!” I hadn’t yet encountered the most unique media player on the market. Or whatever.

Being a number-crunching geek & criminally insane came in very handy on this effort. Although the First Life DuroSport uses incredibly large numbers in its DRM scheme, they seemed not be enough when put into the infinite possibility of Second Life. Our initial attempts were, well, let’s be honest here… disastrous. Music was escaping from the player at an alarming rate. For a company whose motto is “Your Music Will Never Escape”, that wouldn’t really fly. I kept raising the numbers, till they were like huge plus 13…. but still we had random sightings of herds of wild Fall Out Boy mp3s all over the north end of the grid. Pretty sure we got ‘em all, but they breed like mad in there. Ebi Ebi put the last one down himself, just like in Old Yeller.

Which brings me to my confession. After the Fall Out Boy incident, I got frustrated and just told the big-ass numbers in the DuroSport 6001 “TIMES INFINITY!” Worked pretty well in grade school, in Second Life, not so much. The resulting load on Linden Lab’s server made the grid shaky for about a weekend. So what, you never screw up where YOU work?

So the introduction went well, despite all the protesters… They haven’t paid me anything for my work, just offered me something called “coup futures”. Supposed to be like pork bellies, I guess. I get paid if an Eastern European nation changes governments. Or whatever.

At this point I’m just glad to have this project completed. Your music is safe, even in Second Life.

Or whatever.

I am me, Vladimir Concescu, Chief Product Engineer for the Prism DuroSport Company, and am needing response to slandering from Nero. He is not understanding of the future. The future!

Definitions of teenagers is that young people are future. Teenage girls are future. Why am I the My Space with teenage girls is helping the future of DuroSport. Producting research. Has happening before: many importance technology breakthoughs come from producting research. Research!

Remembering the Time GPS — the breaking through for the Prism Two. Ideas from ex-girlfriend where I needed to whereabouts her after breaking many dates. Very sad. But great featuring! Teenage girls chat produce many ideals for Pütz. Ideals escaping over Nero’s overfocused tiny brain. Cannot not even spelling “Vladimir” incorrectly.

Nero seeing always only bad. Perhaps vacationing in Moldovan Prison will helping him? Ha! Ha!

For months now I have been hoping to do a comparison of the two products to prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that Microsoft is stealing our technology. In August we made contact with a Microsoft “Insider”, who shall remain nameless. I’ll just call him Deep Pockets. Mr. Pockets is not such a bad fellow considering that he works for such an evil company. He indicated a willingness to provide us with information that would support our belief that our technical design specifications and marketing plans had been stolen. He was also going to provide us with a Zune prototype that we could evaluate in our testing labs.

Unfortunately Mr. Pockets vanished before he could provide us with a Zune. We have no idea where’s he’s gone. We certainly hope that he’s not been harmed in any way. This is the problem with Microsoft. They sometimes make people disappear. Remember that next time you disable Clippy.

As a result of Mr. Pocket’s disappearance we did not have an opportunity to review the Zune and compare it to the Pütz until this weekend. I was actually forced to use the DuroSport corporate credit card to buy not one, but two Zunes (how else could we possibly test the wireless song sharing?). Using our corporate money to buy a product that was stolen from us in the first place was the ultimate insult.

To make matters worse, when I arrived at my local Best Buy on Thursday night there was a line around the block. The police were there trying to bring order to the crowd. It was a near riot situation. All for the Zune?! Can you imagine how crazy these people will get when our Pütz is released?

Finally around midnight they started letting us into the store and I was able to buy two Zunes. Most people were actually buying Sony PlayStations, if you can imagine that!

While Microsoft seems to have stolen many of the features from Pütz, they haven’t really implemented them very well, as you’ll see in my in-depth comparison below. In the end I think you’ll agree that the Pütz has many advantages over the Zune. Read on, and see for yourself:

Microsoft Zune vs. Pütz DuroSport (the next generation Prism DuroSport in case you haven’t been paying attention):

Product Name: Pütz and Zune are very similar four letter words designed to define a unique brand. Both have Z’s in them. While Zune starts with a Z, Pütz ends with a Z. The obvious difference between the two is that Zune has no umlauts. To be honest, I think it would be a better name if it were spelled Züne, but that might be too obvious a similarity – even for a company as shameless as Microsoft.

So which product has the name advantage? Ultimately I think it comes down to this: Zune is a dirty word in Hebrew while Pütz is named after one of the most respected players in American Baseball. It’s pretty clear which product is more family friendly. Would you want your children listening to a Zune? Just think about that for a moment. The implications are not pleasant. You’ll be much happier when little Johnny looks at you and says “Daddy, I want a Pütz”.

Compatibility: I’m surprised by the Zune’s limited support for some of the more popular audio and video formats. In fact, the Zune is even incompatible with Microsoft’s own PlaysForSure standard.

While it’s true that the Pütz is incompatible with the previous DuroSport formats, we offer a conversion kit which also works to provide full compatibility with a wide range of formats including iTunes. Zune can’t even come close to that sort of compatibility. Also, the Pütz is what we call a UMD (Universal Media Device), which means that it can play most popular media formats including Super 8, cassette, and VHS.

Software and Setup: This is an area where the two products are very much alike. Out of the box both media players can be setup in a little under six hours.

Product Size: The Zune is slightly larger than the iPod, but it’s still not big enough. The Pütz on the other hand is much larger than the iPod, and sturdier too. Our corporate policy on product size is well known. We’ve made a promise that our products will always be larger than our competitors and we’re sticking by that promise.

Capacity: This is an area where Microsoft has demonstrated an inability to think outside of the box. The Zune has a 30 GB internal hard drive. There are only so many songs you can store on an internal hard drive. The Pütz on the other hand has a 50 MB internal hard drive and also supports multiple types of physical media as noted above. Think of all of the music you still have on old cassette tapes. Now you can listen to all of your old favorites on the Pütz. With Pütz’s support for removable media there are no limits! Advantage Pütz.

Wireless: The Zune’s wireless capability is pathetic. The Zune can only connect to another Zune. What use is that? Who has a Zune anyway? Well, I have two, but that’s beside the point. I certainly don’t want them and I’ll be selling them on eBay any day now.

Pütz’s wireless is much more flexible and powerful than the Zune’s. Not only can the Pütz connect to another Pütz, it can also connect to your PC, the Internet, and broadcast to AM radio! Our wireless transmitter has a two mile radius (pending FCC approval). In fact, the Pütz’s wireless is so strong that we’ve received reports that the signal actually interferes with microwave ovens!!

Battery life: Both media players run on batteries. Is that a coincidence? I think not. Zune run’s for just under 12 hours per charge. The Pütz runs 48 hours (first charge only). DuroSport’s battery technology is clearly superior to Microsoft’s. I know this for a fact because there are only so many companies that have permission to deal with the North Korean scientists who developed our battery technology.

DRM: Microsoft has used a new type of DRM for the Zune. No one knows how secure it will be. If you buy a Zune someone could very easily steal your music. Then you’d have no music and a worthless Zune.

DuroSport has also developed a new DRM system for the Pütz. Our DT7 DRM is even more secure than our previous unbreakable DT6.

Available Songs: The DuroSport song writing has been working overtime for months to write new songs exclusively for the Pütz. Vladamir has been in the recording studio for weeks working on exclusive recordings for the Pütz. Has Mr. Bill Gates written or recorded any songs for Zune? None that I’ve heard of.

So there you have it. The most comprehensive comparison of the Pütz and the Zune ever published. It’s pretty clear that while Zune is a complete rip-off of the Pütz, it’s still an inferior product.

Stay tuned for more information on the Pütz’s upcoming launch.

I am me, Vladimir Concescu, Chief Product Engineer for The Prism DuroSport Company. You are wondering where we are. Busy! We had huge responding to Blogger Day in Moldova post, so Nero had to make it Blogger Week in Moldova. Moldovan hotel industry overwheming by bloggers. Very excitement!

I am now not just Chief Product Engineer, I am also Chief Deal Engineer. Not my official title, ha! ha! I live for product engineerment. Always.

But I am engineering deal that has me hyperventilation with excitement. Hyperventilation more than if Mariners win American League Pennant and not Tigers winning. Tigers! How is that in possibility? Because in American Baseball, anything is happening. And it is happening all of the time!

And anything is also happening in American Music Industry. Especially happening with powerful international product company like Prism DuroSport!

It is, of course, widely known that I am President of the Moldova Chapter of the Tom Waits Fan Club. He is my favorite Singer of Songs. What is not so widely known is that I am also President of the Moldova Chapter of the Scarlett Johansson Fan Club. She is my favorite Actress of Films.

So several weeks ago, when I was learning that my favorite Actress of Films was negoitationing to release CD of her singing songs of my favorite Singer of Songs, it was like peanut butter cups for me. Only with music.

It was naturally that I could use my Moldovan Fan Club connections to bring this CD to Prism DuroSport’s next-generation digital player,
Pütz. I used internet e-mails to engineer exclusive dealmaking with people represented Tom and Scarlett (as people said I am calling them now.)

So I am having the announcement right now: when Pütz is releasing early next year, it will contain, as pre-ordained content with every player, the entire digital recording of Scarlett Johansson Sings Tom Waits.

Best of all, it will be the World Premiering!! On Pütz. And because the Pütz player will be releasing in Moldova prior to releasing to rest of the Earth, only in Moldova at first are people listening to Scarlett Johansson Sings Tom Waits. And because of Prism DuroSport’s unbreakable DRM, it will being truly exclusivity to Moldovans!

See Father, I do too caring about Moldovan people! I don’t have to actually being there to giving myself to my homeland!

That’s why I am in hyperventilation! Take that, Microsoft and Apple! Your stealing of this idea is not going to be so easy.

Needless to say, DuroSport corporate is not happy about all of this Zune media coverage. Pütz came first, and has most of the same features and a better implementation of those features (detailed analysis to follow very soon). So, why is it that only the otherwise mediocre and iPod loving MacNN has mentioned the Pütz???

I suspect it may have something to do with the blogger junket that Microsoft sponsored earlier this month. Did you really think all of those music bloggers just suddenly decided to write about Zune on the same day? What are the chances of that happening? Somewhere between zero and none.

The worst part about all of this is that it has caused us to have so many extra meetings. Meetings that have nothing to do with finishing the great Pütz product. Meeting that take up so much extra time, when I’m already falling behind on my blogging and the MySpace!

Regardless, after all of these extra meetings we now have a plan. DuroSport Corporate has authorized me to make a special offer to bloggers. Here it is:

We would like to invite you to a special blogger day in Moldova for a free preview of our new Pütz technology. We are anxious to get your opinion and to have you write about our revolutionary product on your very own blogs. If you write for a music, technology, or entertainment blog and are interested in participating please contact me by email at AskPutz(at)PrismDuroSport.com. Explain who you are and why you would like to participate.

The fine print (that’s what Legal calls it). While the preview of our new technology is free we cannot provide transportation, accommodations, or meals. There will be no snacks either. Unlike some other companies we are taking great pains not to violate your journalistic integrity! This way we will ensure that you feel obligated to write whatever nice things you want to about the Pütz. We will also help you with your articles by providing free fact checking of your stories prior to publication.

There are a limited number of place available. Hurry and contact me today.

I am me, Vladimir Concescu, Chief Product Engineer of the Prism DuroSport Company, and we are still pretty stunned about the stunning news about ripoffs of our music system naming idea from Microsoft.

As Nero pointed out earlier, we are Seattle Mariners fans. Especially me. I love the Ichi-rolls. Very tasty. I eat 3 or 4 per game. And I am very excited with the closing of the game guy. J!J! Putz! And we are all standing and cheering and the screaming!! I am teary in my eyes I am so happy to be discovering the baseball stadium fans. So unlike the Moldovan soccer team, which isn’t even qualifying for the World Cup qualifying rounds. It makes me fight the hard fighting for the name Pütz, and now am disillusioning. Very much.

So I’m asking you this, Bill Gates: Putz is having 25 saves this years. How many saves is Zune having??

The answer: ZERO! Zero saves for Zune. As a matter of fact, according to the Baseball site, Zune has never been playing in Baseball!

It is just one more reason people should choose Pütz over Zune.

Does it look at all familiar?

To make matters worse, after looking at this so called Zune Insider Blog, it appears that Zune has more than a little in common with Pütz! And they announced this all just days after we announced Pütz!!
I’m not sure if this is a case of corporate espionage, or what, but I’m certainly going to make a call to Legal – pronto!

I’ve heard a few complaints from some whiners who are concerned that their old music won’t play on Pütz. Don’t worry, we’ve thought of that — of course (we’re not stupid – we’re the DuroSport company after all). There will be a conversion program that will assist in the transition. Pricing has not yet been set for the program or the per-track conversion fee.

I can also confirm that we probably WON’T be licensing DT7 to technology partners. First of all, doing so would create unnecessary competition with the Pütz Music Store (which is only a rumor at this point, but the competition would certainly be real), and secondly we just didn’t have very good working relationships with our DT6 partners. Frankly, they expected us to do a lot of the hard work, spend money on marketing, and assist them in building their businesses. That’s just not how a strategic partnership with DuroSport works. DuroSport spent a fortune developing the superior DT6 technology. If our partners can’t figure out how to build a profitable business around it that’s their problem.

Also, I just want note that we’re technically not eliminating DT6. We will continue to support that technology as long as there is a demand for it (or until our inventory of DT6 compliant devices runs out). If you want to waste your hard earned money on yesterday’s technology that’s your business.

That’s all for now. I’ve already said too much.